Yes, there are many things. Many, many things. In fact, this could probably become an ongoing series.
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My neighbor know THE EXACT second that I fall into the sweet spot of a nap on a quiet Saturday afternoon. Because that’s when he wanders over to our house and holds down the door bell (Dddddddddddddddiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing. Dong). And every. single. time. he asks “Did I wake you?”
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Men who wear white sunglasses. Need I say more?
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People who have no idea how to merge onto the freeway. Don’t zoom onto the on-ramp at 80 mph and expect me—the current occupier of the lane—to move out of YOUR way. YOU are merging with ME. On the flip side, please don’t drive onto the freeway at 20 mph and stop at the end of the ramp, waiting for traffic to clear.
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Without fail, every time I go to Jersey Mike’s for a sub, there’s a woman in line ahead of me who wants to order 10 sandwiches, but no, she doesn’t know what she wants. “What’s the #9? Uh-hu. And what’s that come with? Can I get ham instead? What about the #3? And the #4? Right. And what about that there wrap? What’s on that? How many people will that feed? Only 1? You should make bigger wraps. Now, what’s that Mike’s Way? Do I have to have it Mike’s way? Can I get it my way?”
Please grab a menu, step out of the line and make a list. Better yet, call from home. Because after 10 hours of your questions and customization I’ve passed out because my blood sugar dropped and I’ve gone into shock.
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Do you remember when you took driver’s education that they taught about safe distances between cars? Do they now teach that as an optional rule? I can’t tell you how many times I’ve almost been rear-ended by some asshole who races up to my rear bummer so he’s only about 3 inches off the back of my car and then decides to jerk the wheel into the next lane, almost taking my trunk with him. But if that’s not scary enough, the asshole tailgating HIM rarely anticipates this move, and once the car moves out of the lane in front of them they’re almost always stunned to see a car there. My car. It’s like a high-speed game of chicken and I’m going to be the one to get cooked.
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There are three stalls in the bathroom at work. The other day I was in one of them. The doors to the other two stalls were wide open, clearly indicating that they were available. I was in the third, finishing up, and flushing. At that moment a woman walks into the bathroom, and starts yanking on MY door. The closed door. The one with the flushing toilet. And for the life of her she does not understand why she can’t get in. She even asked. “Is anyone in here?” I see this woman in my building all the time. She is not blind. She is not hard of hearing. Clueless? Possibly. Because as I walked out of the stall, she was standing right in front of the door, ready to push her way in like it was a fucking elevator, totally annoyed that someone would be using that stall. Her stall apparently.
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Okay, your turn. What annoys you? (Besides this post?!)
I hate crappy drivers too! And what is it about merging that is just too difficult for some people? Far too many people come to a complete stop and wait for traffic to completely clear before pulling out into the merge lane. You have your own lane for a little ways for a reason, people. Use it.
I also get annoyed with people that act like walking on the sidewalk is a contact sport. It’s not. Most sidewalks are wide enough for 2 people to pass without anyone pushing anyone. And don’t even get me started on people with strollers…
This may fall more under disgusting than annoying: men who wear sandals and have toenails that are so disgusting you want to puke. Yeah, you know the ones I’m talking about. I don’t want to write out the details because it makes me queasy just thinking about it.
I miss Jersey Mike’s. There’s nothing like that here. The closest is Subway, and well, it’s not really close at all. Is it?
Oh GOD. The ugly man feet and sandals thing is so gross! Cover those things up, men!
This morning I merged onto the freeway behind a woman who came to a screeting halt at the end of the ramp. I almost slammed into her and then I almost got killed by the Ford F350 barreling down behind us. It’s so dangerous.
I wouldn’t even know where to begin to answer that question; or once begun, I wouldn’t know where to stop. When you’re trying to exit a building and there are about 6 doors and everyone is trying to push in and out of one door because it happens to already be open. People standing on escalators. Bicyles on sidewalks. Cars in crosswalks. Long lines in shops and then when another cashier opens up the last person in line runs over and gets served first…
The thing with the cashier drives me nuts. It happens every time without fail. And that last person in line, who’s been waiting all of 2 seconds compared to my 10 minutes, is bent out of shape because they’re in a hurry. I actually had someone say to me once: “You waited this long, you must have time. I’m in a hurry.” Nice.
This post isn’t annoying, it’s fantastic. What annoys me is people who park their cars on the left side of the street to get their mail from our nearby mailbox. I guess they think the law doesn’t apply to them? They are too important to park on the right side and have to cross the street to get their mail. ARGH.
A friend of our next door neighbor’s will routinely park on the left side of the street. In front of our house. We live at the end of a cul de sac. Is is that hard to drive 5 more feet, turn the wheel and pull up to the curb on the correct side? Apparently, it is!